Scene 1, Week 7: Table for Two
NMRC camp, edge of the Digital Desert ; Commons tent.
<Joc> The weekend is coming! Yay! Today's Friday! I love Friday!
<Hunter Lerris> Why are you so happy it's Friday? You don't have school or work, you don't watch Anime on Cartoon Network's Adult Swim, and we fight more bosses etc on the weekend.
<Joc> But it's Friday! How could you hate it!*
*Light Slimes. Go figure.
<Hunter Lerris> Bad stuff happens on Fridays. Name one major catastrophe that didn't happen on a Friday.
<Joc> Well, the last two months you spent in Leandr's winter wonderland with its exciting conclusion didn't end on a Friday.
<Hunter Lerris> But it started on a Friday. And that entire thing was one big Friday.
<Pidedis> Oh, quit moping! Here's your lunch. ::sets a steaming plate in front of Lerris::
<Hunter Lerris> Thanks Pidedis. ::sets about destroying his lunch::
<Joc> Since when did you being Lerris his lunch, Pidedis?
<Hunter Lerris> This tastes oddly familiar....
<Pidedis> He looked busy. I'm allowed to be nice...
<Joc> And why are you still here? Waiting for a thank you kiss?
<Pidedis> No! I'm still here because I'm arguing with you!
<Joc> Excuse, excuses! ::sticks his tongue out::
<Hunter Lerris> It's not Simian Apple. It's something far more sinister......
<Pidedis> Excuse this!
Pidedis attacks Joc with Thor's Hammer...
118 damage!!
<Hunter Lerris> WAIT!!! ::stands up suddenly::
<Joc> ::pauses in the middle of his Divine Light:: What?
<Hunter Lerris> She fed me Angst O's*! That's for Phantom Ghosts! I think I'm gonna be sick!
*A depressing cereal for Phantom Ghosts. Yuck.
<Joc> Oh.... Nice one, Pidedis.
<Hunter Lerris> I thought you were on my side.....
<Pidedis> ::flashes a smile:: Thanks for the compliment, Joc.
<Hunter Lerris> I thought I could trust you....
<Pidedis> Your bad. You know what they say about Greeks bearing gifts^*.
^*Umm... If Pidedis' title is "Sky Valkyrie", shouldn't that be Norsemen bearing gifts?
<Joc> He never learns.
<Pidedis> I think it's cute.
<Hunter Lerris> Ahhhhh!!! Leandr's back!! ::dives under table::
<Joc> Man, that Leandr incident really shook him up. That was cruel.
<Pidedis> And well timed.
<Joc> Exactly. You are the Master.
<What Yet May Be> Are you two teasing Lerris again?
<Joc> Of course!
<What Yet May Be> Come one, Lerris. ::takes him by the arm:: Let's get some lunch and leave these two pranksters to find another victim.**
**This is what I get for having a bunch of powerful NetMonsters with Friendliness and Mindfulness scores under 20 (out of 100).
<Pidedis> You're such a baby, Lerris!
<What Yet May Be> Just ignore them. I have some lasagna waiting in the next room....
<Joc> A nice romantic meal for two. Someone get a candle!
<Pidedis> ::laughs as a hint of sadness enters her face:: Good one.
***********************************************
NMRC Camp, Digital Desert , left row, tent #127.
<???> He's so close to his breaking point. I'm going to enjoy this.
***********************************************
Scene 2, Week 7:
Bad Kitty (or Unexpected Dessert)
<Keda> Hey! I resent that remark!
***********************************************
NMRC Camp, edge of the Digital Desert , Lerris' tent.
<What Yet May Be> Really, I don't see why you put up with them.
<Hunter Lerris> You get used to it, after a while, I guess.
<What Yet May Be> But they sound so much like... well, you know...
<Hunter Lerris> Perhaps I permit their existence and behavior as a compensation technique to help me accept what was lost, or the possibility exists that I am rebuilding an identical world of glass around myself, to permit the illusion of doubt and allow myself to draw back into denial and fantasy. Or this could all be one very long dream, as I dodge the drudgery and possible torment of my life. Or, better yet, this may be an offshoot personality who has gained temporary consciousness due to trauma, a coma, or possible----
<What Yet May Be> You've been reading those Self Help and Psychology books again, haven't you?
<Hunter Lerris> Yeah. How did you know?
<What Yet May Be> I have my ways. Is it possible for us to have a normal conversation?
<Hunter Lerris> I guess so.
<What Yet May Be> You'll spare me the "no one leads a normal life during a war" bit, then?
<Hunter Lerris> Of course.
<What Yet May Be> Good. So, just how close were you to them?
<Hunter Lerris> (nervously) I thought you said this was going to be a normal conversation.
<What Yet May Be> It's a perfectly normal subject, if you ask me.
<Hunter Lerris> Okay... Well, there were only a few of them. Nothing past double digits. They were all good friends. Not too many were vastly powerful. So, we just pulled our own weight and fought Shade the best we could. No biggie.
<What Yet May Be> And then... It happened, didn't it?
<Hunter Lerris> Do you know what the odds are of that happening? A random encounter like that is estimated at 1/200. That's .5%. That's still bigger than the chance of one of the RDLP readers winning, but that's small! All of them lost on .5%.... Sometimes I wonder if they hate me for it.
<What Yet May Be> Hence the special treatment of recaptured Security Nodes? Guilty conscience, eh?
<Hunter Lerris> Sometimes I wonder if I'll ever find one of them again. Double digits out of what, several million NetMonsters? That's even worse than the .5%!
<What Yet May Be> Answer me truthfully Lerris, for if you don't, I shall hate you forever. Am I your first champion?
<An odd, soprano voice from outside the tent> Lerris! Lerris, where are you?
<Hunter Lerris> Light. It couldn't be. Those Angst O's seem to be taking effect...
<What Yet May Be> Angst O's?! I thought you were just being dismal. What are you doing snacking on Angst O's? If your going to snack on Ghost food, at least stick to Scary Berries*.
*A Common Ghost's favorite treat.
<Hunter Lerris> Hey! I didn't eat it on purpose. It's like "Holy Kitty" Cat Food*. They trick me into eating it!
*Preferred by 5/5 Light Cats.
<What Yet May Be> Well, it's your fault for being so gullible.
<Hunter Lerris> Really? Gullible? I'll show you gullible... ::flings a forkful of lasagna at his Champion::
<What Yet May Be> Hey! That's my nice leather jacket! Not only did you over-react, but you believed that gullible joke. Which shows just how gullible you are. ::is hit with more lasagna:: Okay! That's the last time I ever make any food for you. You ruin your appetite with Angst O's and then fling it at me.
<Hunter Lerris> You made this? ::looks down sheepishly:: It's very good. Thanks--- ::is hit by projectile pasta:: Wait a minute! Weren't you just chastising me?
<What Yet May Be> ::giggles:: You really are gullible.
<Hunter Lerris> Am-- ::gets a face full of tomato sauce and hand grated cheese:: Now that wasn't very nice. Eat... lasagna, you evil fiend!
<What Yet May Be> Evil fiend? Oh really! Perhaps it's time for desert... ::pulls a pudding out of nowhere::
<Hunter Lerris> ::gulps:: Uh.. I was… kidding... about the fiend... thing.........
<What Yet May Be> ::chuckles::
<Hunter Lerris> Oh. This is part of that gullible thing, right? You wouldn't really dump that pudding on me.
<What Yet May; Be> Wrong. ::dumps pudding on Lerris' head::
<Hunter Lerris> I can't see! Beware What Yet May Be's dread Pudding Throw. Data Nodes and Shade beware! She's coming, and she's got pudding in four different flavors!
<What Yet May Be> Well, that seems to have cheered you up. Next time you get all gloomy, I'll have to remember that. I'll just dump pudding on your head.
<Hunter Lerris> You wouldn't dare!
<What Yet May Be> Or just a Slime.
<Hunter Lerris> You're cruel!
<What Yet May Be> (sullenly) You miss them terribly, don't you?
<Hunter Lerris> Yes.
<What Yet May Be> Thanks for coming for us. Thanks for coming for me.
***********************************************
<???> Hello. Arimas here. I, the god of cats*^, will perform this issue's Lottery. Ah... With the touch of a god, how can you help but win? Your host seems to be preoccupied with unimportant matters, like covering his female companion with assorted food items. Sounds most unorthodox and ungodlike. From the bowels of the Net, I command an entry be brought forth!
*^One of the 84 bosses loyal to Shade. Spent a little too much time at an Egyptian historical site. See? The proverb is true: Those who spend too much time learning history are doomed to repeat it.
<Keda> I don't think that's how that goes, Lerris....
Element: Fire Combo: Dog-Bird-Mech
Level: 90
<Arimas> Still nothing. How disappointing.
What is Shade's lackey doing hanging around here?
Why does every issue come back to food?
Will Pidedis try anything further?
Will Fridays get any better?
Can Robert keep this semi-weekly?
Exactly what were Lerris and What Yet May Be talking about?
What has become of Leandr's crystal?
Will Lerris read any more books and use big words?
The answer to these exciting and intriguing questions next edition of NML !!!
