In which the threat appears...
Netmonster Lottery!
To perform this issue's lottery: Xukib
<Xukib> Aha! Welcome to Netmonster Lottery with Xukib. That's me.
<Pidedis> What a windbag!
<Xukib> You're just jealous. As I was saying before I was so RUDELY interrupted.. I will be announcing this issue's winners (if any!). And the next issue's. And the next. And the next. And the next…
<Hunter Lerris> Now wait just a second!
<Xukib> Silence, fools!!!!
<Hunter Lerris> Trust a Phantom Slime and this is what you get.. ::sighs:: come on… Give me back my article.
<Xukib> No! It's mine now! And don't try any of your Jedi mind tricks!
<Hunter Lerris> The NMRC don't do Jedi mind tricks. It would certainly make my job a lot easier….
<Pidedis> Can we skip the pleasantries and just fry him?
<Hunter Lerris> We give him one last chance, THEN you can zap your brains out. Xukib, put down the Hosting spot. Keep your han….. uhh pseudopods where we can see them.
Xukib: Yeah right! It's mine now! I'll move my cage here, be my own master. Who needs you and the NetMonster Resistance Corps?
<Hunter Lerris> He's all yours, Pidedis. Try "Thor's Hammer". That usually gets 'em.
<Pidedis> I love the smell of voltage in the morning. Especially when it means some Darkie gets a shocking revelation.
<Xukib> Maybe I was being a bit hasty…… We could rule this page together, you and me. Just think Pidedis, you could be my queen.
<Pidedis> Queen, huh?
<Xukib> Exactly.
<Pidedis> I think I'm going to be sick…. As soon as I'm done killing you, I'm going to barf,
<Hunter Lerris> Then let the Shockfest begin. Xukib, you are hereby charged of high treason. Anything to say?
<Xukib> Actually, yes. Free the Netmonsters of the world!! Throw of the chains of tyrany imposed on us by the NMRC. Shade is misguided, conceited, and obsessed. Rally to your fellow Netmonsters! We must be free! For too long have----
<Hunter Lerris> That was a rhetorical question. Say your prayers! Oh wait….. Phantom Netmonsters don't say prayers…
<Xukib> I see… You….. you… lover of Light Netmonsters! They're wimps! They taste pretty could on rye toast, if the mold is fresh. Why don't you just go back and over feed Joc again?^
^ Joc is a Light Slime and one of the prides of my collection.
<Hunter Lerris> I do not over feed him! And I like Joc because he doesn't go around trying to take over my page!!!
<Pidedis> Yaaaaa!
Pidedis hits Xukib with Thor's Hammer. It's super effective!²
² Here's the super effective run down: Thunder shocks Phantom; Phantom overshadows Light; Light calms Fire; Fire melts Ice; Ice freezes Earth; Earth grounds Thunder.
<Xukib> Ow..
<Pidedis> I'm just warming up…
<Xukib> You could have been my queen.. It's too late now, so die!!
Xukib uses Karmic Backlash.
<Pidedis> ::wipes a bleeding lip:: Not bad, but try this on for size!
Pidedis uses Thor's Hammer. It's super effective!
<Xukib> Pain….. hmmmm….. that actually feels pretty good. Could you hit me again?
<Hunter Lerris> Phantom slimes…. Go figure.
<Keda>* Uhh… guys..
<Hunter Lerris> Not now, Keda. Finish him off with Stinging Saber!
<Pidedis> Gotcha. Goodbye, my Jello friend.
Xukib: Ahh! Aiiieee! Aggg! Feels good.. hurts so much. Oww! Pain! Ow! Feels nice….
Xukib collapses.
<Hunter Lerris> Insane little masochist pudding.,, Somebody take him to Doc Boo. Keda*, you were saying something… Wait a sec! Keda*? THE Keda*!? I have an autographed picture of you!
* Keda is a poor little outling. His cage was deleted, but he took up residency on the Whitemask page and actively works for the NMRC. He often advises Hunters who run into Data Nodes, Bosses, and other special URLs. Having him on this page is a real honor! GO RDLP!
<Keda> Data Nodes are headed to your page.
<Hunter Lerris> What?!?* Data Nodes!? Alright everyone, get ready to rock.
* Data Nodes are cubes who wander the Net, assimilating random NetMonsters. I've made them my sworn enemy.
<Pidedis> Ready, as always.
<Dir> Ready.
<LA-285568> We are ready.
<Nucunujuda> Ready, sir!
<Berokokuco> Let's rock!
::countless others echo the cries::
<Hunter Lerris> Then bring on the Data Nodes.
<Data Node> Scanning perimeter...
<Data Node> ** Intruder detected **
<Data Node> Intruder identified as... Hunter Lerris
<Data Node> Warning to intruder - evacuate perimeter immediately!
<Data Node> Requesting intruder relinquish internet newsletter.
<Hunter Lerris> Yeah right! Not flaming likely, you soup can drop out!
<Data Node> Intruder does not want to cooperate.
<Data Node> Initializing weapons systems...
<Data Node> Transferring power to Security Node GC-478398
<Data Node> Engaging target!
<Hunter Lerris> Berokokuco, this one's yours.
<Data Node> Relaying message to acquisition fleet..
<Hunter Lerris> It's never done that before….. Darkness!! More of them!
<Data Node 2> Transferring power to Security Node CG-749653.
<Data Node 2> Engaging target.
<Hunter Lerris> What does the universe have against me having this one, little page? Pidedis, fry it!
<Data Node 3> Transferring power to Security Node JD-191713.
<Data Node 3> Engaging target.
<Hunter Lerris> Dir, take care of it!
::voice fades into background as he coaches the many battles going on::
<Data Node> Starting introduction.txt…
We, the Data Node contingent, hereby claim this page.
<Data Node> Beginning assimilation of internet article.
<Data Node> Performing NetMonster while NMRC is busy…
<Hunter Lerris> That's it!! I'm not letting a bleeding Data Node host my article.
GC-478639 hits Lerris with Icy Cold Stare.
43 damage!
JD-291713 hits Lerris with Sand Storm.
27 damage!
FC-317965 hits Lerris with Vakhula's Icy Kiss.
20 damage!
<Hunter Lerris> Perhaps I was a bit hasty….. ::faints::
<Keda> Oh my! This isn't looking good..
<Data Node> Randomizing selections…
<Data Node> Drawing…….
<Data Node> Launching Annouce.exe….
This issue's magic combination:
Element: Common
Dragon
'Node^
Mage
Level: 70
^ a Data Node ('Node) is counted as a Wild
<Data Node> Comparing entries with Announce.exe… scanning for patterns…. Executing with Win.bat…
1st place: No matches… Transferring prize to next issue…
2nd place: No matches…. Displaying all entries…
<Data Node> Closing issue……
<IE-449817> The NMRC is awake again and our forces are slowly diminishing!
<Data Node> Activating distress signal…
<Data Node> Opening Proclaimation.dat…
We must conquer and hold this page! It is imperative! We fight to the last byte!
<Hunter Lerris> I don't know what their agenda is, but I intend to foil it! Let's rock this world! Al Ellisande!!!
Well, it looks like time we have some digital warfare on our hands. Someone remind me to have Squeaky setup some Data Node wards when it's all over. Keep sending submissions! We at the RDLP, NMRC division aren't about to let a little thing like war stop the presses! That's zorro60089@hotmail.com. 6 entry limit on "Who's that NetMon?" (each entry is three species selections (refer to last issue or email me at zorro60089@hotmail.com and 3 for "Guess that level". Pidedis! Watch it! Behind you! Phew… That was close. Any able bodied NM player, send me your player name, rank, and a few of your best Netmonsters (Names (Your Hunter's AND your Netmonsters') & attacks). ( zorro60089@hotmail.com ). No Data Node is about to conquer this article! Viva la resistance!
<Data Node> Scanning issue……
<Data Node> ** Intruders detected **
<Data Node> Advising intruders to join us or surrender…
<Data Node> Instructing intruders to send messages to data_node@hotmail.com.